What am I going to do about this.....?

I don't think that this is normal...

I need some serious help with this and it's going to seriously kill me one of these days. I mean, I'm being truly serious here. I'm going to end up driving myself crazy and I don't think I can go that way. It would be too much stress on my family. Plus, way too much money...

Just, the memories need to stop. I can't handle the pianful shit anymore. I'm done, you're supposed to be dead, how can you still make me feel like you're still here haunting my every step? Its been at least 7 years since it happened and since you died, it's not supposed to last this long. I just want it to go away. I don't even care what it takes, I just want to stop feeling you there.

I just wish that I could've been one of those normal girls that everyone likes to be around, who has a really nice guy to call my own, and who doesn't have all this shit in my past.......

I want these stupid anxiety attack to go away, I can't handle them anymore.....